Top Ten Signs You May Have A Drinking Problem

Top Ten Signs You May Have A Drinking Problem

10.  If you wake up next to a naked girl and a naked guy...  put down the bourbon. 

9.  If your idea of dinner is the complimentary peanuts at the bar...  put down the gin.

8.  If you consider masterbating in your car a "good sexual experience"...  put down the whiskey.

7.  If you wake up with black eyes, hickeys, and a dog that isn't yours...  put down the sambuka.

6.  If you have to say sorry again to everyone for urinating on your friend's birthday cake...  put down the rum.

5.  If you feel like you are a "excellent drunk driver"...  it's time to put down your stupidity.

4.  If six, of your last seven, sexual experiences ended with you having whiskey dick...  it may be time to put down the fireball shots.

3.  If you are constantly drunk texting old, high school girlfriends asking "do you want to have phone sex"...  it may be time to put down the vodka.

2.  If you think you have a real shot at dating "Chasity" from RC's Go-Go...  put down the Irish Car Bombs and your money.

1.  If you've been to Bugattis or P.J.'s Nineteenth Hole more than one time in your life... put down the scotch and your dignity.

It's Graduation Time!!!

It's our favorite time of the year!!!  A chance to see what our talented gang improvisers have been up to all winter long.  

We have 3 great shows for you...

An Evening with Harold and Harold Junior
(the 202's and 303's)
Wednesday, May 8th at The Iguana
7pm  .  Totally Free

The Pushers' 202 level improv students jump head first into the wonderful world of Harold in what we like to call... Harold Junior. While the 303s and friends take the Harold head on!

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Mr. Harold Goes to Washington
(the 404's and 505's)
Wednesday, May 15th at The Iguana
7pm  .  Totally Free

The 404's tackle The Harold, perhaps the best know style of long form improv.  It starts with an audience suggestion, then improvisers weave together scenes, characters and group games to create a seamless piece.  It can be bizzarre and magical, baffling and amazing... it definitely needs to be seen.


Then you're invited to The Town Hall Meeting.
Watch as 505's create a small town and all it's inhabitants right before your eyes.  It's like Mayberry, Pawnee and Springfield all rolled into one topped off with a heaping dose of acid.

 

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The Virgin Sketch Show
(the Sketch Writing 101s)
Saturday, June 1st at The Iguana
8pm  .  $5 (the can't all be free)

The writers of our Sketch Writing Class have been slaving away for months (under our expert and somewhat drunken tutelage)... and they've come up with a kick ass show. Don't miss it, it's going to be hilarous! It's a perfect chance to see some fresh, new comedians.

 

Special One Day Workshop by Alba Woolard

***Special One Day Workshop*** 
Using Environment to Bring Improv Scenes to Life

by Alba Woolard

Our very own Alba Woolard will be teaching a one day improv workshop!!! Sunday, May 19th at The Muse Writers Center.

This workshop will focus on adding depth to scenes by creating realistic environments for characters to play in.  We will work on specificity in use of props and visualizing the setting of the scenes. Exploring these layers will help improvisers relax into scenes and play more instinctively.  Also, this is going to be a whole lot of fun!

This class is open to improvisers of all skill levels!

Sunday, May 19, 1 p.m.-3:30 p.m. 

Sign up at the-muse.org

Top Ten Ghent Bars To Meet Guys

The Top Ten Bars To Meet Girls

 

10. Tortilla West- Ladies, if a man who loves art and himself in the arts, this is your domain.  Wear jeans and a t-shirt with an obscure pop culture reference and you'll fit right in.  Warning: Guys that cry while making love can get old.

9. Luna Maya- Senoritas, if a man that dresses classy is your game, then this is your casa.  Wear something flashy and get your margarita on.  Warning: The waiters are hot and so is the clientele. Warning: Luna Maya closes at like 7:15 every night so get in fast.

8. The Taphouse- Girlfriends, if a guy who doesn't dress well, but has a high sex drive is yourgame, this is your world.  You can get away with granny panties, but don't wear flip flops because the bathroom is contagious.  Warning: making out with a Taphouse lad probably means you're depressed and not using good judgement.

7. Fair Ground's Coffee- Earth Biscuits, if having an actual conversation over a warm coffee is your thing, then this is your sanctuary.  Sure there is no liquid courage, but you might meet a man who likes poetry and can play the ukulele.  Warning: Poetry and Ukulele's doesn't necessarily equal big penis.

6. Cogan's Pizza- Lasses, if a weed-smoking hipster is your kink, then this is your haven.  Wear your best non-prescription glasses and pizza it up with the weed-heads.  Warning: it takes an hour every time you order a drink and smoking weed in the back parking lot is acceptable.

5. The New Belmont- Groupies, if your searching for a man who likes to rock out with his tattoos out, this is your jam.  Wear rose colored lipstick and tease your bangs and get ready for a conversation-less night.  Warning: Rock stars are fun, herpes isn't.

4. 80/20 Burger Bar- Sweethearts, if a picky burger eater gets you off, then this is your burger king.  Dress casual with a hint of hipster.  Warning: The Guys here like to get their drink on and sometimes that can lead to an 80/20 percent chance of whiskey dick.

3. Red Dogs- Bitches, if you are looking to slut it up, this is your brothel.  You can get away with wearing your period panties because Navy Squids don't give a flip!!!  Warning: Frat boys, Squids, and Jocks tend to like pool and pitchers more than treating you like a pretty princess, so just slum it in and get out.

2. Public House- Dames, if you like an intellectual professional man, then this is your candy land.  Go on trivia night and wear something with a lot of leg, natural makeup, and flats.  Remember PH boys think of themselves as smart, so let them go on believing that.  Warning: The alcohol content is greater in most of their drinks, and so is the risk of beer-goggles!!!

1. A.W. Shucks- Gals,if you are looking for the "it factor" guy, then this is your ocean.  Grab a drink at their awesome bar while wearing a dress that reveals just enough, but not too much.  Warning: The men here are super charming and have a little money to blow, but remember seafood can lead to bad breath.  Bring tic-tacs and show these men what a fish taco really is about!!!

(This list was made from over 7 Ghent Girls who wish to remain anonymous)

Ten Red Flags at the Start of a New Relationship

The Ten Red Flags at the Start of a New Relationship

10.  If your man tells you how much money he makes, but then makes you pay for dinner...  Unfurl the Red Flag.

9.  If your lady gets free drinks at every bar you go; and the bartender smiles and says, "You've earned that drink, sweetheart!!!"  Unfurl the Red Flag.

8.  If your man ever says the words, "Just the tip?!!!!"  Unfurl the Red Flag.

7.  If your girl tells you she normally is quiet, but then talks for the next 7 hours straight without coming up for air...  Unfurl the Red Flag.

6.  If your man of steel speaks extremely ill of all his "b#tchy ex-girlfriends," beware you are probably next...  Unfurl the Red Flag.

5.  If your lady friend says, "oh you don't need protection, I'm a good girl."  Unfurl the Red Flag and a Condom.

4.  If your new boy toy talks about his Playstation 3 more than your eyes...  Unfurl the Red Flag.

3.  If your woman checks Ghent Crushes and Facebook for your whole date, she probably cares too much about image...  Unfurl the Red Flag.

2.  If your mighty man calls his own name out while he makes love...  Unfurl the Red Flag and hide your mirrors.

1.  If you facebook stalk your new girl and all of her pictures are of her doing body shots, kissing other men (and women), and riding on a donkey naked...  Unfurl the Red Flag, get a saddle and ride 'em cowboy!!!!!!!

Top Ten Ghent Bars To Meet Girls

The Top Ten Ghent Bars To Meet Girls... according to Brad

 

photo by AltDaily

10. Red Dog- if you are trying to mack on a college girl this is your joint. Just remember frat boys like to fight and college girls are young and often stupid... Get in and then get out...

9. Kelly's Tavern- if you are making it with a smoker this is your jam. Cheap date that could lead to uncomfortable sex in that small A bathroom. Remember your date will smell of nicotine.

8. Colley Cantina- if you have a loud talking girl who doesn't know how to modulate her voice, this is your jam. What I'm saying is it's noisy and your mate will be loud and obnoxious as well.

7. Cogans Pizza- if you want to have a cheap slumming date with a tattooed hipster this is your parlor. The pitchers are cheap and so are the women.... Just remember hipsters smell.

6. Tortilla West- if your girl is a theater chick this is your stage. Go on taco night and remember theater people are obsessed with talking about themselves.(Trust me on this one) Get some ear plugs and enjoy the tacos because you won't enjoy the conversation.

5. A.W. Shucks- if you are trying to meet a mid to upper class Ghentite, this is your mecca. Just remember making out with a girl after they eat a fish taco can lead to an upset stomach. Plus most of the bartenders have been with that girl first.

4. Bardo- if you are looking for an over-priced night with a pretentious girl this is your nirvana. Just remember if you make out with a dooshy girl here your wallet will get smashed and you may not get any.

3. New Belmont- if you want to dance and not have a conversation this is your arena. Groupy rock chicks are fun, but please remember these two words when your with a Belmont chick: Con-dom!

2. 80/20- awesome bar with plenty of hot waitresses. This is a cool 
place and very hot right now. Be careful though healthy burgers can lead to healthy flatulence and nothing ruins the mood more than a tooting girl.

1. Public House- if you like pricey beers and trendy chicks, this is your haven. Girls that hang out on the non-smoking side like to eat and girls on the smoking side like talk. Being with a Ghent girl at PH is like a choose your own adventure book so choose wisely and enjoy the cider.

Norfolk's Better Block

On April 12th and 13th, Better Block will be transforming a block of Granby Street at Olney Road.  Come experience a walkable, bikeable district with pop-up businesses, public art, street furniture, landscaping and outdoor cafe seating! Fun for all ages!

Friday night The Pushers will be performing two improv sets (6:00 and 8pm), then on Saturday we will be teaching a FREE Intro to Improv Worshop (noon to 1pm).  Come check us out inside the Texaco Building (759 Granby Street . Norfolk)

 

Along with our two FREE improv sets and our FREE Improv workshop, there will be great performances by Gina Dalmas, seamonster, Broken Mouth Annie and Galaxy Dynamite!. Kitsch will be selling their cool and eclectic wares; and O'Connor Brewing Co. will be manning the beer tent.

 

...and that's just inside the Texaco Building. There's so much other cool stuff going on in the other buildings, we can't even list it all.

 

Don't miss out. It's going to be a great time!!!

Here's the official line-up for Friday night.

5pm Nate Sacks
6pm The Pushers
6:30pm Broken Mouth Annie
7:15pm Gina Dalmas & the Cowtippin' Playboys
8pm The Pushers
8:30 Seamonster
9:15 Galaxy Dynamite

Cuff Me Is Coming To Virginia

The Pushers' Off-Broadway musical Cuff Me: The Unauthorized Fifty Shades of Grey Musical Parody is coming to Virginia!!!

May 23 and 24 it will be at The National in Richmond.
Then it comes to The NorVA for May 25 and 2 shows on May 26.

It's going to be a helluva good time so get your tickets at Ticketmaster now.

More Cuff Me!

Cuff Me: The Unauthorized Fifty Shades of Grey Musical Parody has debuted in New York... and Sean, Brad and former Pusher Jermiah were on hand to do some interviews.

Here's just a sample of some of the stories that have been popping up.  

Variety

The Virginian-Pilot

ABC News

USA Today

The Independent (Ireland)

The Sydney Morning Hearld (Australia)

CBS News

We are extremely excited about this show!!!  We'll share more as we get it.

Cuff Me Pics!